Salt-dästür / Салт-дәстүр

As the proverb goes, “Even if you are hungry for six years, never forget your father’s customs,” highlighting the deep-rooted importance of ata joly (ancestral path) often evoking a deeper connection to the past. The complexity of salt-dästür lies in its diverse elements, from celebrations and rituals to beliefs and prohibitions, as well as parenting and upbringing. They encompass all spheres of our lives: celebrations like uilenu toi (wedding), rituals like qyrqynan şyğaru (performed on the 40th day after a baby’s birth), ceremonies like sälem beru and bata alu honoring elders and demonstrating respect, customs like baıǵazy (gift-giving), körımdık (material congratulation), and süınşı (announcing good news), traditions like qonağası (hospitality), and inheritance within qara şanyraq (family home).
In Qazaq upbringing, special care is given to daughters. The birth of a daughter is believed to bring blessings, with a saying that “one daughter brings home seventy angels.” A girl is seen as a cherished guest in the family, symbolically seated in tör – a place reserved for honored guest. A man who raises three daughters with wisdom and love is promised a place in paradise. The practice of qyzğa qyryq üiden tyu (forty prohibitions for girls) involves relatives offering valuable lessons on conduct and boundaries. A well-raised daughter not only upholds her family’s values but also brings respect back to her parents and ancestors.
Traditions are largely nationwide, even if certain ceremonies vary across different regions of Qazaqstan. While some customs, such as sälem beru and şai beru—where a kelin (daughter-in-law) bows to and serves tea to her husband’s parents daily—are seen by some as outdated, others continue to value and uphold them. Each family navigates which traditions to retain or adapt, reflecting the evolving role of salt-dästür in modern life.